Question : Salam. I never thought I’d ever go through a heart break. I always thought it wasn’t for me but secretly I’ve liked this brother for a loong time now. I found out that he likes someone else and wants to marry her, who’s my best friend. I’m so shy to tell anyone, thinking they would simply tell me to just get over it. But it hurts :/and my self esteem just took a huge blow. I really went ahead of myself nd let those feelings take over. I didn’t think it’d be like this. I just want to cry 😦 Help
answer : Waalaykom Assalaam.
I was discussing something similar to this recently with my mentor/one of the kindest and most awesome people I’ve ever had the privilege of knowing.
And so he told me a story. He had been engaged and in love to the woman of his dreams for two years; they were talking about getting married and having children. One day, she broke up with him. He didn’t tell me why, but the expression on his face as he was recalling the event was enough to make me understand how devastated he was. He then looked at me and said, “I never thought I would get over it. I wondered why God would do something like this to me. But Subhan Allah, six months later, the best thing that could have ever happened, happened.”
His wife then joined us and told me how they met—how they had been at an event and someone asked her what she thought of him—how she had said he was unattractive and weird—how then she decided to give him a chance—and then how they got married two months later in a mosque with a couple dozen people, because, despite being well-off, they wanted to start their journey together with modesty.
He told me that sometimes, despite how much you want certain things to happen, they won’t happen. They just won’t. And right when you think that all hope is gone, God will send you a sign and assure you that everything will be okay. Masha Allah. He’s been happily married for over 12 years and with four of the craziest and most adorable kids.
Few things hurt as much as loving someone who loves someone else. You can almost feel it tear away at you. But you have to get up, and you have to keep going. You have to have faith in the only One who is All-Knowing and Wise. Because God is the best of planners, and Insha Allah He will send you the best person for you when the time is right.
Please, don’t look at it as if there is something wrong with you. A relationship is based off of two people and how well they work together. This may mean that you would not have worked well as a unit, despite both of you being magnificent people. He didn’t have feelings for your friend because youweren’t good enough, he had them because he thought she would be better with him.
It’s okay to cry and have a date night with every girl’s best friends, Ben and Jerry. No one said life was easy, and no one said you would just be able to “get over” a heartbreak. However, try not to resent your friend; she deserves to be happy too. Just take it one day at a time. And Insha Allah, in due time, you’ll find someone just for you 🙂
now you mention it, well what a great answer i got from thegreaterjihad but wait wait…
i mean it’s not me who asked a question i just copy it here because i like the answer hehe :3